Equipment cards are among some of the most popular types of artifacts in Magic: The Gathering. Similar to auras, equipment cards can provide a creature with numerous beneficial abilities and stat increases. However, while aura usually go to the graveyard after the creature they’re attached to leaves play, equipment cards stick around, waiting to be equipped to another creature.
While there is a wide range of excellent equipment cards such as iconic standouts like Sword of Fire and Ice, and Commander’s Plate that was recently printed in Commander Legends, not all equipment cards are created equally. There are many equipment cards that players would prefer to forget about (if they haven’t already) that don’t have a fitting home in any format or deck. So today, we’re going to examine the worst of the worst when it comes to equipment cards in Magic: the Gathering’s history!
10 Angelic Armaments
When it comes to equipment, one of the most important things to note about a given card is that it has two costs: the card’s mana cost and its equip cost. In most cases, unless a player is using a card such as Sigarda’s Aid, both costs must be paid for an equipment to be used.
With this in mind Angelic Armaments is a cards that doesn’t supply nearly enough value for the costs it demands. A three mana equipment with a four mana equip cost, this artifact provides a creature with flying and +2/+2. This card also does add white to the creature’s color identity and makes it an angel, but these abilities are usually negligible. Regardless, a total of seven mana is a ludicrous cost for a single keyword and a +2/+2 buff.
9 Rosethorn Halberd
Printed in Throne of Eldraine, Rosethorn Halberd costs a single green mana to put into play, and provides an equipped creature with +2/+1. Unfortunately, the card is greatly hindered by a massive equip cost of five mana. While this card can be immediately equipped to a non-human creature when it enters the battlefield, one can’t help but compare this card to the Iconic aura, Rancor. Rancor offers the same amount of power, trample, does not require an equip cost, and is even capable of recurring itself, removing the most common problem that aura’s face. This leads Rosethorn Halberd to simply serve as a weaker, watered-down, and more narrow alternative.
8 Wooden Stake
While incredibly flavorful, in most cases, Wooden Stake’s ultra-niche design doesn’t make for a sought after card. While reasonably priced at two mana and only requiring an equip cost of one, the card in most cases does little to nothing. Providing a small +1/+0 boost to the equipped creature, Wooden Stake causes any vampires blocked by the equipped creature to be destroyed. While this can serve as some tech against a vampire deck, in the majority of cases, it’s strictly worse than the card, Bonesplitter, which totes a smaller cost and a +2/+0 benefit.
7 Copper Carapace
Relatively straightforward, Copper Carapace is a one-mana equipment with an equip cost of three, that provides an equipped creature with +2/+2. While there is definitely worse equipment around, when compared to a card like the previously mentioned Bonesplitter, the card is essentially charging two more mana just for an additional +0/+2.
6 Slayer’s Cleaver
Slayer’s Cleaver is an equipment card with an identical mana cost and equip cost to that of Angelic Armaments, but with an even more niche and less applicable upside. Providing the equipped creature with +3/+1 (a terrible rate for seven total paid mana), Slayer’s Cleaver states that the equipped creature must be blocked by an Eldrazi if able.
Between lackluster gains and an inflated cost, it’s hard to recommend this card for any deck, even one situated within an eldrazi-heavy meta, as it offers no protection from the creature type.
5 Wolfhunter’s Quiver
Similar to the Wooden Stave and the Slayer’s Cleaver, the Wolfhunter’s Quiver is a card that is stifled by a reliance on an opponent’s creature types. Though this equipment only costs one mana to put into play, it has a hefty equip cost of five. Once equipped, the equipped creature can be tapped to deal one damage to any target, dealing three damage if the target is a werewolf. As a player is not very likely to regularly face off against werewolves, a six-mana investment for a “pinger” is a far cry from worthwhile value.
4 Grifter’s Blade
Grifter’s Blade is a three mana equipment with flash. Once it’s cast, it can immediately be attached to a creature. While these may sound like solid upsides, it all falls apart once one finds out what the Grifter’s Blade does: provide the equipped creature with +1/+1. That’s it. Though instant speed is nice, Grifter’s Blade does little more than provide a +1/+1 counter for the cost of three mana!
3 Vulshok Gauntlets
While Vulshok Gauntlets has a reasonably costed converted mana cost of two, its equip cost of three certainly doesn’t do it any favors when remembering the card’s inherent drawback. Once equipped to a creature, these gauntlets provide +4/+2. While this could definitely be better, there are far worse rates for the same cost. However, where this card falls on its face is that a creature equipped with these gauntlets can’t untap during its controller’s untap step. This means that if a player wants to get repeated use of this card, they are most liking going to need to keep paying additional mana, equipping it to different creatures each turn.
2 Heavy Arbalest
Ever wanted to pay seven mana to deal two damage, all while preventing one’s own creature from untapping? Then Heavy Arbalest might be the card one is looking for. First printed in Scars of Mirrodin, this card is as overpriced as it is weak. While seven total mana between its casting cost and equip cost are already much higher than they should be for the damage the card can deal, the card is made infinitely worse by preventing the quipped creature from untapping.
1 Razor Boomerang
Razor Boomerang is an abysmal Magic card that should not be included in any Magic deck, regardless of format. Plain and simple. With a casting cost of three and an equip cost of two, Razor Boomerang allows the equipped creature to be tapped to deal a single damage to any target. While this rate of five mana and a tapped creature is already a pathetic cost for one damage, the kicker is that after the ability is activated once, the boomerang is returned to its owner’s hand. This means that after paying all of that mana and jumping through these hoops, a player must do it all over again!
